New Year // New Goals.

"Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk." -Dalai Lama

My oh my, I am a night owl. And I am going to regret this in the morning while I'm struggling through my law class, bright and early. But if my brain won't shut itself down, I may as well do something (semi) productive, right? :)

With the new year fast approaching, I've been thinking about what my resolution(s) should be. I always try the same things every year and fail... Miserably. No more Diet Coke! No more procrastinating! No more swearing (ha)! And I've come to realize, instead of adding something to my life to increase my happiness, I just focus on taking away the things that seem negative on the surface but honestly help make me who I am. Most people who see me everyday would probably be surprised if I didn't have a soda nearby and multiple curse words didn't come out of my mouth during the course of our conversation. As for procrastinating... I can only vouch for it by saying I work well under pressure and generally have exceptional results when I put things off until the last minute... Or perhaps that's my brain trying to subconsciously justify my bad habits. Who knows. :)

So instead of trying to pull pieces of myself away, this year I would like to add more positive elements to my world and not be afraid of making big changes. I get so comfortable sometimes, which is better than complacency, but I've come to realize my creature comforts could begin holding me back from the things I truly want in my life. I want to branch out--continue trying new activities, joining different circles of friends, putting myself outside my realm of normalcy--and be happy while doing it. For the past few months, I've really worked on this and I think I've been doing okay. But I can do better. And I will. And with my college graduation coming up in May and having the big, scary world looming right in front of me, I'm ready to hop on this new train and enjoy the ride.

In this same vein, I think I need to work on setting myself up for success but being okay with not achieving it. Or perhaps not achieving it right away. Friendships, classes, jobs, relationships... I've always tended to go with what has been right in front of me and available. Not necessarily easy, but available. I'm willing to work, and work hard, for the things that I want, but I don't always express clearly what I want. Or that I will make sacrifices and changes in order to find happiness in what I want. So I'll also be adding "get out on a damn limb and take a chance with telling someone how you feel" to my list of resolutions. Because life is too short to put on hold the people (and things, I suppose) that make me happy and make my world a better place. And not taking the risk of letting someone know what I'm thinking and how I'm feeling--whether it is about them personally, or getting a job, anything--will only mean I won't be able to work for what I want. I've just got to figure out where the line of good timing and being patient is compared to the line of being assertive and confident.

I hear resolutions aren't always easy. :)

Finally, I hope the people in my life also realize the incredible impacts of positive emphasis and positive reinforcement and don't keep trying to do away with the things in their lives they always felt were "bad." I'll be sending out good thoughts to everyone I care about and hope they find some light and try something new--Not just in the New Year, but for the last month of 2011, as well. Send it off in style!

Also, completely off topic, I cannot quit listening to the song "Turning Page" by Sleeping at Last. It is so beautifully composed and calming... And the lyrics touch me in a way that makes it hard to shake the smile off my face. :) If you're looking for a sweet song to fall in love with this winter, I'd recommend this one.